Full
disclosure: I was whipped as a child—didn’t like it much, but I’m not mad at
all. And yes, I whipped my two children, too; both are now college students. I’m
sure they didn’t like it, either.
So
why, pray tell, am I defending a man who did the same to his children, but got,
“extra” with a whipping and is now looking at jail time? Because, dammit, I
understand; I say again, “I understand.”
No, being
a parent does not give you the power, authority or right to brutalize, bully or
torture your children; does not. But being
a parent means you have a responsibility to protect your children by any damn
means necessary.
Greg
Horn’s two daughters disobeyed him. He decided to make them more afraid of him,
than of the danger he was trying to keep them from. Hence, he resorted to
whipping them. (Note: it is unclear whether the girls were, in fact, Twerking or
they went out without permission).
There
are bad people in this society—pimps, drug dealers, human traffickers, gangs, boogie
men that go, “bump in the night,” and predators of the very twisted kind. And
they are just waiting for children who do not listen to their parents and cross
the proverbial line that has been set forth. Horn, did what he thought he had
to do, to keep his daughters from harm—direct, indirect, as it were.
Regrettably,
in his overzealous attempt to protect them, he actually hurt them. That is
unfortunate. However, I support a parent—any parent, who opts to keep their
children in line instead of trying to be their friend. In these bizarre times
where kids are competing to show who is the, “biggest and the baddest,” on
Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, etc., parents must be vigilant, firm and
show no fear. Sure, not every kid today will want to run for political office
in 20 years. But soon, acquiring a job at Mickie D’s is going to be a challenge
once Ronald McDonald starts to Google every applicant that walks through the
door to see what kind of smut they posted on the world wide web, “back in the
day (mark my words—it’s coming!).”
I
have a friend who contends that Horn’s actions are just an example of a man
trying to control a woman’s body. Furthermore, said friend implies that Horn is
ignoring the fact his daughters are in fact, sexually active. Hmm…
Maybe,
just maybe this man’s head is buried in the sand about the sex lives of his
daughters, who are already, “doing grown up things.” Maybe this public, humiliating
whipping will push these girls further away from their father and they will
indeed follow a road of degrading, self-deprecating, dangerous and deadly
sexual acts; maybe…
But
what if this is the teaching moment the Horn family needs? Perhaps this is what
pushes Greg Horn to sit his daughters down and say, “You may be having sexual feelings
and urges; and that’s normal. But you must be responsible with your bodies. Do
not let any man take advantage of you, disrespect your body or make you feel
less than the beautiful women that you are.”
Then
to let them know how much he really cares, he should add, “And the man who
treats you ‘ill’ will answer to me.” Powerful shit, right there, since they
know their father can whip some ass!
Furthermore,
Mr. Horn can be an example to other parents of how, “keeping it real with, ‘Old
School’ punishment,” can go horribly wrong. In my opinion, his punishment should
be to explain to other parents who are also struggling with their teenagers how
he might have handled this differently.
I
have one last suggestion to Greg Horn, and all parents. Always keep the phone
numbers of Big Mama, Uncle James, a few “true-blue-and-tight-like-glue” best
friends, etc. on speed dial. This is so that when the children, “test” you,
there is another responsible adult who can help you to, “pull up,” “pull back,”
and calm the hell down, as it were.
In a
society where absentee fathers are the norm, I trust and pray the Horn sisters
are grateful that they have a father who is present, and more importantly, one
that actually gives a damn.
4 comments:
Another good post, Sonia! One thing that I've read and considered: Would the reaction have been the same if the father had caught his sons watching a twerking video? Hmmm ... I doubt it.
Perhaps, "father" Horn should have sat them down before leaving open wounds on their young bodies. Now, instead of having normal feelings about sex when they are adults, they will always associate that "feeling" with an ass whooping...(said friend).
@ Chante: the double standard regarding the behavior of sons crossed my mind a couple of times while writing this. That is another forthcoming blog all by itself. Stay tuned...
Good reading Sonia
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