Bugging Out in the ‘Burbs



Not so gently into that good night do the woods and creatures who inhabit them go. Well, they go, because the bulldozer leaves them no choice. But the aftermath of their unceremonious evictions and in some cases, their death, causes reverberations felt by the funky Homosapiens who should know better than to allow this to crap happen.

In 2002, over 70% of the green space in “the unnamed county 30 miles east of Alabama” was cleared for development (commercial and residential). 70%. Now, that may not seem like a lot, but it sure has made an impact on Bambi and ‘em. Incidents involving deer have risen tremendously. I, myself, have had to hit the brakes quite a few times to avoid hitting the ones wandering on Rose Ave. on foggy spring mornings. Said mornings, in the natural scheme of things is when these deer would be out mackin’ because it is their mating season; instead, they are house hunting.

Other animals are just plain pissed. Fox attacks on humans were visibly higher in 2004. With no where to go, these half-feline, half-dog creatures are striking back. And where indeed, are they supposed to go? Should they pitch a tent in the Outdoor section at Super Wal-mart on Hwy. 5?

The wildlife inhabitants of the county are being forced out for more shopping centers, homes that cost an astronomical amount of money and people who really don’t give a rat’s tail about what all this building is doing to the environment.

When territory that God beautifully created and should be left “untouched,” is constantly being invaded, it causes major problems with ants, crickets, frogs, snakes (yes), lizards, spiders, lady bugs (ugh, they leave such a nasty red stain when you smush them), and termites.

The infestation of termites and the fight to keep them out of our home intrigues me, especially with regards to a new subdivision. Heck, the termite is only doing what we have started and continue to do: eat away at stuff and destroy creations of beauty.

Still, we spend hundreds of dollars to get rid of these bugs, slugs and whatnot because we feel they are invading our turf. But hey, weren’t they here in the woods not bothering anyone when we came along and built several houses on top of their houses?

So how can we get upset when there is a new ant trail running through the living room? Or frogs keep hanging around the patio door? Or, if every morning we catch Bambi nibbling on the peach tree we planted in the backyard? If R. Kelly is sitting at home, watching television, and without warning, someone kicks his door in, tears his house down and builds a daycare center in its place, can we blame him if he begins lurking around said daycare center with a video camera…?